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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23157778">All work and no play, let me count the bruises</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cutebutpsyco/pseuds/cutebutpsyco'>cutebutpsyco</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>IronStrange Bingo 2020 Fills [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Doctor Strange (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Discussion of Abortion, Don't Post To Another Site, Forced Abortion, Implied/Referenced Abortion, IronStrange Bingo 2020, Multi, Past Abortion, Trust Issues, ironstrange bingo, relationship dynamics</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 11:49:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,506</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23157778</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cutebutpsyco/pseuds/cutebutpsyco</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p><b>IRONSTRANGE BINGO. FILL: IRONWIDOWSTRANGE ||</b> <i>“The scar,” Barely a whisper, Strange didn’t need to ask which one she was speaking about. “I know you saw it. You can ask.”</i></p>
<p>
  <i>“Will you tell me the truth?” An elegant eyebrow was lifted at that, implying that the Supreme Sorcerer already knew the answer. It didn’t require a genius to understand that it was pretty low in Nat’s priorities if she did all that fuss in trying to hide it. </i>
</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Natasha Romanov/Stephen Strange, Natasha Romanov/Stephen Strange/Tony Stark, Natasha Romanov/Tony Stark, Tony Stark/Stephen Strange</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>IronStrange Bingo 2020 Fills [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1664644</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>IronStrange Bingo 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>All work and no play, let me count the bruises</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Back at trying to do something, thanks to quarantine and the fact that I decided to browse through my past WIPs. This is my first fill for the ironstrange bingo 2020 and I decided to start with this square because you all know I love the three of them. Though there's not a lot of Tony in this one. I'm sorry, you'll see more of him in the next fics. <br/>I needed to investigate more on the StrangeWidow part of this wonderful OT3 of mine. This can be read alone, but I feel like it'll make at least 90% more sense if you first read <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/19019215">this other fic</a>.</p>
<p>As always, not betad, and nothing belong to me. Title from "Still Sane" by Lorde.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You can ask, you know?” Stephen stopped immediately, he had been pacing back and forward for the Sanctum all caught up in his studies and he didn’t even realize Nat was there. From the tone of her voice and from the fact that she was half lying on the small sofa in front of the Sanctum sigil, it was clear that she didn’t just enter the room and yet, he didn’t realize that much. Stephen shook his head, understanding that now he was staring at her, questioning himself on how she entered the room without alerting him. </p>
<p>“What?” He asked, instead, focusing back on his girlfriend’s body. “Sorry I was in a loop.”</p>
<p>“The scar,” Barely a whisper, Strange didn’t need to ask which one she was speaking about. “I know you saw it. You can ask.”</p>
<p>“Will you tell me the truth?” An elegant eyebrow was lifted at that, implying that the Supreme Sorcerer already knew the answer. It didn’t require a genius to understand that it was pretty low in Nat’s priorities if she did all that fuss in trying to hide it. </p>
<p>“I could, probably. It’s not like Clint doesn’t know.” Stephen knew what it meant. Clint Barton was the person who knew Natasha the most, while he was sure she had secrets with him too. It was fine, he had his own secrets and so did Tony, he would never ask either of his partners to tell them all. Trust was a tricky thing for them, and trust no-one was a hard lesson to unlearn. </p>
<p>“Was he there? Back when…?” How Nat and Clint met was still a secret for most of them, Tony and Stephen included. It was frustrating, probably, but Strange knew Christine had secrets she would never disclose about the Doctor so he couldn’t complain. </p>
<p>“No, this is older,” Nat nodded, her jade eyes looking for Stephen’s. “I just didn’t realize he could understand what it was. At that point, I must tell him.”</p>
<p>“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to,” Stephen said. He wanted to know, and not just out of curiosity: he could see that it was devouring Nat from the inside and he really couldn’t bear the idea of having her to face that alone, now that he knew, even if it was pointless, by now. It was something that happened decades ago, there was nothing the doctor could do for her. “Just know that your secret is safe with me.”</p>
<p>“I do know,” Another nod, and Strange didn’t know what she knew. More than most people supposed, less than she showed, but probably she knew everything he said was true or, better, he liked to think his partners trusted him that far. “I was fourteen. There was a Russian politician who had a thing for young girls, very young, younger than I was back in the day. He was running for president, so the Kremlin decided it was a good idea to expose his preferences to the world, - her glance was distant, looking at the wooden ceiling over their heads. - I’ve always been tiny, I also looked younger than most of the others. But I wasn’t their first choice… Yelena was…” Natasha’s voice faded into black and Stephen had no idea about who Yelena was. He had never heard that name before, and still, he knew he had to do something, if only because the Cloak was physically pushing him toward the spy. He was bad at that. Lucky for him, it lasted a couple of seconds, then she continued: “I offered myself to volunteer. People in the Red Room, they were delighted. In the end, they chose me. Very young girls can’t get pregnant, and I had no idea what was happening with my body. They… They understood it after six months. You know the rest.”</p>
<p>Stephen knew that the shaking in his body wasn’t because of his damaged hands. He also knew that Nat was trying to keep her voice straight but he could hear the tears in it. The flash of red which left his shoulders to fly over Nat’s body was just the last confirmation he needed. “I’m sorry…”</p>
<p>She turned to look at him and in her eyes there were tears, tears he knew she would have never shown to anyone else. She didn’t try to tell him it was fine, she didn’t say anything, just staring back until the Sorcerer Supreme moved a step forward to reach her, seated by her side. Natasha let her head to rest on Stephen’s lap and after some moments when he manoeuvred her and himself the Sorcerer was lying by her side on the sofa, holding her close. “Maybe this is why I’ve never really…” She whispered, against his skin, and that was enough for him to understand. </p>
<p>He didn’t move, he said anything, he just ran a shaking hand in her hair, waiting for Natasha to continue. “I mean… I’ve never been the mom kind of girl, I guess because I’ve never had a real childhood or the like, but most likely it’s because of this.”</p>
<p>Stephen nodded, he knew there were billions of words he could say, but he also knew her, she didn’t want any. She was rationalizing something that has probably bother her for her entire life, and he could understand her. Maybe someone would have told her it was wrong, that trying to find the rational explanation to everything led to nothing, but Stephen wasn’t such a hypocrite. He did the same, and he knew why she needed to do that. It was simpler to understand, it made them appear less broken. </p>
<p>They stayed like that for a little bit longer, Nat’s legs entangled in Stephen’s long ones, her head buried in his chest and the Cloak covering and embracing them both. He knew she cried, at some point, because his t-shirt started to feel wet, but pretended she didn’t. After a while, though, Nat started to move a little bit, until her elbows were on Stephen’s chest and she managed to push herself up, looking straight at his eyes. “Stephen Strange, you are one of the best men I’ve ever met, thank you for being in my life.”</p>
<p>It was playful, but he knew she really meant it. Once again, he knew she was pretending to joke because it was easier than to admit the truth. Easier, simpler to silence what they just shared. </p>
<p>“Doctor Stephen Strange,” He answered, pushing himself up so that their lips met. “And you don’t have to thank me, never.”</p>
<p>“You are here,” Once again, a broken whisper that didn’t belong to the Black Widow’s façade. Sometimes he wondered how easy it was for him to see behind her mask, to look at her and just see Natasha, the scared girl, the one who had to fight for everything she had. Those were the times when he wished he’d known her before. They were similar, scaringly so. “It’s easier, with you and Tony.” </p>
<p>Stephen nodded. “It’s easier with you and Tony, Nat. I’ve never thought someone could love me… After the crash, with this crazy life. I should be one thanking you.”. </p>
<p>She laughed softly, her fingers pushing against Stephen’s in the weird way she had to hold his hand without hurting him. Stephen was aware of that, and he thought that maybe his partners didn’t deserve this. To have to be cautious around him, to never allow themselves to be broken, tired, impulsive because they were scared they could aggravate the situation of his hands. This was why he never told them when they hurt worse. And yet, he suspected they understood it. But not that day, which was why Stephen curled his fingers around Natasha’s while pushing their foreheads together. </p>
<p>“Thank you for trusting me,” He knew trust was their biggest problem, they faced it in different ways and Stephen was the one who trusted the others less, but it wasn’t like opening up for Nat and Tony was easier. </p>
<p>“We both know I can kill you in your sleep if you dare to say something,” And while Stephen knew she was joking, he also knew she was being perfectly serious about killing him in his sleep. Not that he would have ever said whatever confidence he received to anyone. “Now, what’s bothering that pretty head of yours, Mr Doctor?”</p>
<p>“I don’t think it’s something you can help about, Mrs Spy,” He retorted back.</p>
<p>“I’m a fast learner, and having a different point of view can be helpful.”</p>
<p>“You’re spending too much time with Tony,” Stephen flashed her with a smile. Yes, maybe she didn’t know a lot of magic and the likes, but she was a strategist, and she was probably right: he spent too long on the problem, and seeing things from a different perspective could be useful. </p>
<p>“Or maybe is the other way around,” Natasha answered, tilting her head by one side. “Now, move your lazy ass and tell me what’s bothering you.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The cards will be soon up on Dreamwidth and Pillowfort, for now, if you have any prompt for me, just reach out on <a href="http://ironstrange-is-the-endgame.tumblr.com">tumblr</a>. </p>
<p>My commissions are currently on due to the fact that I'm not working because of quarantine.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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